Perhaps you are curious about how I can make this statement when positive affirmations and positive psychology are popular practices with support to back their use. Give me a few minutes of your time and I will explain.
You are probably aware that a positive affirmation is a statement of intention. In my book, Fear Unravelled: Transform your thinking and manifest the abundant life you deserve, affirmations are referred to as power thoughts. These statements of intention follow some general principles, including:
- The affirmation must be focused on what you want and not on what you do not want. For example, “I don’t want pain” is not a positive affirmation because it is focusing on what is not wanted. Slightly better, would be “I am pain-free”. Better yet, would be “I am living fully, actively doing all that I need to do and more”. The latter affirmation focuses on the outcome that is desired in a clear and positive manner.
- The affirmation must be stated in the present tense and use “I am or I have”. Framing the statement as “I will, I want, or I hope” are not strong affirmations because it keeps the desire in the future and in the energy of wanting rather than having.
- Focus on a vision of your desire with the feeling of gratitude as though it is already your reality.
However, even with following these steps and understanding how these steps work, your affirmation still may not work! Why?
The first reason that your positive affirmation doesn’t work is that it takes time for them to manifest and we simply get impatient and start to doubt. Doubt reduces belief and you lose hope. This moves the energy of your thoughts into the energy of not having and now you are no longer aligned to your vision, nor do you have the feeling of gratitude.
The second, more complex reason that your positive affirmations don’t work is that you have a belief so contrary to the affirmation that the more you state the affirmation, the more your subconscious fears arise to protect you from the very thing you state as your desire. Here is an example to illustrate this point.
- You affirm you are abundantly wealthy, in an attempt to change your circumstances and attract more financial security. It seems pretty simple and encouraged as a common practice by all kinds of self-help gurus. However, not in your awareness, is a belief you hold that money is the route of all evil and will cause you to end up alone and unhappy. As long as this fear of money exists in your subconscious, affirming you are abundantly wealthy will not be helpful. To attract a better financial experience, you must flip the relationship you have about money.
- A second example would be someone who is affirming “I am attracting the perfect romantic partner” but they hold a belief that partners cheat and relationships make you dependent and boring. The affirmation will not work!
You must deal with the underlying beliefs before your positive affirmation will work. First work with the beliefs to Identify, Release, Reframe then start using affirmations!
Manifesting and positive affirmations work when you take the time to do all the steps. You can use a positive affirmation to get started, but the moment you realize it is not becoming your reality, you will want to step back and do some unraveling of your fears that are sabotaging the success of your affirmations.
Sitting down with FEAR is no small feat!
If your affirmations are not working and you are feeling defeated — Fear is standing in your way!
Get some help to identify, release and reframe those fearful beliefs so you can manifest whatever you desire and join our community on Facebook at Fear Unravelled Book Club and be sure to get your copy of the book available at www.fearunravelled.com